Inherited Fears. How To Avoid Them?
In the same way that we feel fear for things we do not yet understand, it is possible that we transmit this same emotion to our children.
As much as we are afraid about something, it is essential that we raise our children in a calm way. If we know that there is no imminent danger , it is advisable to control our emotions and let the little ones feel their own. We parents are the main influence on our children. Therefore, sometimes the “inheritance” that we leave is a mark of our personality.
However, are there scientific grounds to show that fears can be inherited? According to experts , certain traumatic situations could be genetically transmitted for up to three generations in a row. Specifically, fear is generated by an experience that affected behavior. However, this statement does not demonstrate that the phobia is in the DNA.
What are the reasons for unfounded fears?
There are fears that seem to be born with us, but they are due to reactions to changes. For example, the newborn who is afraid of falling or cries because of new sensations, such as changing the temperature of the environment.
However, it would not be possible to say that he genetically inherited the fear of falling . But later on perhaps he was influenced to be afraid of being alone or of seeing an insect.
In any case, unfounded fears are not without cause. Unfounded means that they have no reason to exist or that there is no justification for feeling it. But in theory they appear because a reason preexisted in society that spread among people. So, the root of fear is found in the transmission of this idea over the years.
On the other hand, we are used to scaring children with non-existent characters like “A Cuca” or “O Homem do Saco”. This unjustified fear is self-generated and triggers possible phobias of being abandoned, fear of insects or anything unknown. These are the main fears inherited from generation to generation, without there being genetic information transmitted between them.
How to avoid inherited fears?
If we talk about genetic inheritance, it would be inevitable from a scientific point of view. But as we’ve explained, we’re actually talking about social and behavioral inheritance. It is scientifically known that fears are learned rather than inherited. Therefore, we are fully capable of avoiding them.
To make sure our children don’t share fears that have been with us all their lives, the key is to have self-control. Although there is no exact way to avoid feeling fear or making it disappear, we have within us the possibility of developing strategies to face it.
In this sense, this is one of the efforts that we must necessarily consider making. If we have a phobia, it is understandable that it cannot be easily controlled. But it’s something worth facing up to with courage to protect children from getting scared when they see us out of control.
That said, how can we prevent our children from inheriting social fears? Many people are afraid of snakes, for example. But maybe some child is curious about this animal, without knowing the danger. In this sense, we adults are the ones who, as a precaution, move the snake away from it and, in horror, we warn about the risk it runs. At this point, it is possible that we are transmitting a new fear to the short one.
To avoid a possible phobia, it is important to control our stress, use correct language and try to get the child to reflect rather than frighten her. This is good for the child to have a lasting learning. In addition, we prevent her fears from getting out of hand, making her emotionally unstable.
social fears
In other cases, fears are fully socially transmitted by factors external to the individual emotion. For example, fear of crime, inflation or being single. In this regard, it is possible that without feeling genuine emotion, we may let ourselves be carried away by the opinions of others and end up involved in a web of rumors that affect us and, ultimately, affect our children as well.
Sometimes experiences that are traumatic for people close to us scare us as if we had gone through them directly. It’s the same with children, because they trust the security that their parents transmit to them. Therefore, when we adults lose control, we can inevitably provoke children’s own lack of control.
