How To Teach Our Children To Be Critical?
Teaching our children to be critical is not simple. In trying to do this, we face a double mission: to raise children with their own discretion, but at the same time they are obedient. However, the problem is more one of forms than content.
In practice, parental authority can be a means of liberating learning. In addition, there are techniques that can be put into practice to encourage children to form their own judgment. Conversations, debates and everyday experiences are essential.
training one’s opinion
Any common space is useful for training one’s discretion. “What did you think of the toast?” or “why did you like the movie?” are good options to start. The question is a means of information that feeds both the questioner and the answerer.
Each answer can lead to another question. This type of conversation can end in a question that the child will ask himself. The adult’s position in this type of conversation with the child is like a guide.
However, this conduct of the father or mother should not be directed towards what is expected of the child. The exercise should be more exploration-oriented in order to focus on the child’s preferences and comments.
parents who listen
It is not just a question of asking and arguing, but of knowing how to listen. This can be a problem for some parents who want to impose their opinion or judgment. We must remember that this type of learning does not have a single path. Therefore, the child must have the chance to choose.
Therefore, the correct thing is to listen carefully to the children’s opinions, tastes and analyses. And, if from an exhibition it allows us to explore more, it will be much better. Then there will be more time for conversations about values.
All of this brings us to a third issue: having good judgment and serenity before judging. We parents think that we know everything and that we must always intervene. Sometimes, in exercising this power, we forget to stop for a moment and analyze things.
Teaching our children to be critical is to give freedom
We are all born free, but children have guardians of their freedom: their parents. Parents must consider themselves guides to that free will, not owners of it. Therefore, freedom is the basis for forging children’s own character and for helping them to succeed in life.
Since the arrival of the millennial generation , child psychologists have recommended giving children freedom quotas. It is about a margin of participation, a space for free recreation, spaces to take children’s opinions into account.
However, the commitment of parents does not stop there. These spaces should expand over time. There is no one better than a father or a mother to know the progress of their children. It’s almost a mathematical formula: the greater the criterion, the more access to freedom.
There are parents who manipulate their children
Authority and obedience should not be synonymous with manipulation. In an extreme situation, we have reprimands, punishments and other psychological conditioning. But being a parent doesn’t mean expecting our kids to think exactly as we do.
There are many parents who resort to manipulation and fear to teach their children. This type of practice is very common, for example, in divorces, separations or shared custody. Often the child is used to reach the other.
Over time, children grow and realize many things. Furthermore, the habit of teaching our children to be critical means respecting their freedom. With this, we obtain a correct development of the person who is in the process of growth.
allowing error
Error is learning and this applies to children as well . Common sense is built on trial, error and relearning. If we don’t allow a child to make mistakes with their thinking, then we’re not going to favor the development of a critical view.
The screams and exaggerated phrases will only hurt children emotionally. That way we’ll only get a self-centered, silent and censored child. For this reason, teaching our children to be critical means allowing them to express themselves.
There are situations in which we can allow our children to make their own decisions. For example, when buying a candy, a toy or even something related to the house itself. Allowing this experience will teach us whether our children are good observers and how we can encourage this critical spirit that is so important to them.
